I hate learning foreign languages.  It necessarily makes you feel dumber than a three-year-old, and there are few things I hate more than feeling dumb (maybe pulling teeth  or horror movies).  But there is one huge benefit:  with a grasp on only a handful of phrases, speaking in a foreign language forces people to be more intimate and vulnerable.

I like to use words to my advantage, spinning out sentences that make me seem self-effacing or funny or smart.  The more I say, the less it really means.  But when I’m in Mongolia, I cannot say, “You didn’t have to do that!”  I can only say, “Thank you.”  When I’m in Senegal, I cannot say, “That dress is really flattering, and wow!  Your hair!”  I simply say, “You are very beautiful.”  When I’m in Greece, I cannot say, “I really appreciate what you did for me, that was great!”  I have to say “I love you.”  Continue reading →