When I was a kid, we had the VHS version of The Moon-Spinners that I absolutely loved. I watched it multiple times, and when it was released on DVD I got it for nostalgia’s sake. But I haven’t watched it yet! I brought it with me to Greece (because it’s set here), and I had two very important questions I needed answered:
- Is the guy still as hot as I remember?
- Is the cheetah still as awesome?
- Yuck, I hate how movies used to put loads of credits before the film without even a cool James Bond montage of psychedelic symbolism.
- Crete is on my destination wish list, but not the public transit there…in the 60s, at least. 50s? 70s? I have no sense of the recent past.
- Hayley Mills is British? Huh, I didn’t remember that.
Fran: I say, I wonder if you’d be so kind as to put that (dead fish swinging in her face) somewhere else?
Man: *stares uncomprehendingly*
Nikki: THE FISH. COULD YOU PUT IT SOMEWHERE? IT’S A BIT STRONG. COULD YOU PUT IT SOMEWHERE ELSE?
Man: *continues to stare uncomprehendingly*
Fran: I don’t know why one always thinks foreigners will understand English if one shouts.

- I understand the Greek!! It’s like, the simplest words, but still!
- Of course they enter town on donkeys while a fancy wedding is taking place. That has not been my experience…maybe I need to tour island villages until it happens.
- Telegram? Is this the 40s??? When did telegrams happen?
- Musicologist? That sounds like a cool job, traveling around to find and record folk songs.
- You can tell they’re the female protagonists because instead of getting upset by some truly rude behavior, they put their hands to their foreheads and chuckle about it.
- “I bet the Englishman is super old and boring,” she says, not realizing he is a dreamboat. I HOPE HE’S AS MUCH OF A DREAMBOAT AS I REMEMBER.
- Those short shorts and THAT ACCENT as he vaguely threatens his stalker!
- He claps like an alien wearing a human bodysuit, though.
- Also, who brings a dress like THAT while traveling?? I need to step up my packing game! Hahaha, but okay, NOT that nightgown!!!
- One dinner, one dance, one moon-gazing…. Why isn’t it this easy for me to find a guy in Greece?
- Wow, Mark ran from the middle of the night all the way until sunrise? That’s some incredible stamina–oh my gosh, I know what was so attractive!! He’s wearing slipper shoes with no socks. My Victorian-era perversion is definitely bared ankles! *gasp* Is HE where this began?
- ….Aaaand he’s dead. RIP pretty ankles.
- Just kidding! Him rising from the grave always freaked me out as a kid. Honestly the buildup and suspense is still pretty effective.
- HAHAHAHA, after she discovers him bleeding and half dead in the basement of an abandoned church, the first thing Nikki asks Mark is, “What are you doing here? They said you’d gone.” Chill, girl.
- And his response, after struggling to sit up in his filthy blood-stained shirt? “I, uh, I must have fallen asleep. I’m sorry I stood you up.” You crazy dumb kids.
- Actually, what IS their age difference? Am I allowed to root for this relationship? She’s probably…16? And he’s got to be in his mid-20s. Maybe societal rules don’t count when murder and treasure hunting are involved.
- Favorite Romantic Tropes: women incompetently healing men
- Also: Women screaming “You deserve to die a horrible lingering death!” and the guy replying, “Beat it!”
- I don’t remember what’s buried in the Sea of Dolphins, but MAN. They’ve got to stop (trying to) murdering people over it.
- Alexis, a Greek boy, says, “Ναι,” like “neigh.” I don’t think he’s really Greek. But he CAN climb a windmill like a gymnast, so I forgive the imposter.
- “What are you doing in here?” Alexis asks the girl chained to a wall.
- Hahahaha! She hugs him when he frees her, and the kid says, “No time make love. Quick!”
- And then they can’t go out the door….which was locked from the inside….because why? Oh well, I guess escaping by windmill blades is more exciting.
- Hahaha, I love this too! From screaming at each other to banding together to take down a bad guy to wearily, “Nikki, do you think you can go on alone?” to resting in the ruins of a Greek temple…perfect tropes.
- And of course: we have to sleep in the wilderness, I guess I’ll just have to rest on your shoulder and flirt through necessity.
- Wow, those are some effective security cats!
- “Guns before breakfast are so uncivilized, don’t you think?” is the most British thing to ever be spoken.
- Even though they’re both villains, the posh British white man sitting in his mansion ushering the poor Greek man out through the garden before muttering, “Savage,” is pretty gross.
- Drunk British people complaining about art and the “new rich” and mentioning Madame Habib!!! A woman who sails in her own yacht, entertaining royalty with her PET CHEETAH! #lifegoals
- Ahhhh I’m I love with Mark again! He’s so comfy tired when Nikki wakes him up, and when she asks how he’s feeling he answers, “Peculiar. It must be the color of these pajamas.”
- Wow. First they stumble upon a traditional Greek wedding, and now their ambulance/hearse is caught in the middle of a Carnival parade. They’re getting all the experiences!
- Yeah girl! Stealing a boat, driving it through the night, screaming her way onto a fancy yacht, and when that doesn’t work, forcing them to either run her over or let her aboard.
- My Queen, as two men try to kill each other: “Stop, you’ll smash everything!”
- And the baby cheetah, hiding under the table from the chaos.
- Romantic tropes: “Of all the persistent, pig-headed PESTS!!” *kiss*
Poor Aunt Fran: “Won’t somebody please tell me what’s happening!?”
THE END

I love the Moon Spinners! I’m not reading this, though, because I don’t remember what happened and I want to watch it again without spoilers. 🙂
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I support your decision! But watch it quickly and let me know what you think!
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