A Week in Greece #35: HD CELEBRATION WEEK, GREEK LESSONS, and a lot of FRIEND MEALS

This week has got me thinking that a LOT of my mental downswing the past couple months was because everyone was right:  summer in Athens sucks!

Now that people are returning from holidays, life is going back to normal and I’m feeling so much busier and happier.

HD NEWS

We had our fourth Celebration Week, and as always, it was pretty great.  Well, wait, no.  Holy cow, this week has been long!  Monday was chaotic, and everyone had something awful going on in their private lives.  Our schedule was therefore out of whack, but I felt like I got to step into my unofficial counseling shoes and help people talk about the things that were hurting them.  That part, at least, was nice.

But later in the week, we had more fun times together.  “A” always talks about this souvlaki place she loves, so we all went there on Thursday.  The food WAS amazing, but more importantly, it was FUN.  We talked about all sorts of things, laughed a lot, and bonded more as peers.

On Friday, Dina returned to the office after doing fundraising in the States for six weeks.  After the Celebration Week presentations, we all sat around and ate and listened to her stories.  It sounds like a lot of people are getting really excited to partner with HD, which is exciting!  I can’t wait to see where this all goes.

GREEK LESSONS

I’m starting Greek lessons again (I was off for August).  One of Anthi’s friends wanted to offer her services to HD for free, and I’m the only one who took her up on the deal.  She’s a much more structured teacher, which is great, but the first lesson was humiliating.  We basically went back to the very beginning of everything, and although now (after two lessons) I’m catching back up to at least the middle of my old lessons, it’s just.  AGH.  I have so little motivation for learning Greek except for “I feel like I ought to.”  It’s never going to get better unless I can find a better reason to do it.

FRIENDS

The best part!  I’ve discovered that I really like having people stay at my apartment.  This is weird, because I’ve never thought of myself as hospitable, and I’m a terrible hostess.  But I love having a place where people come and go or crash for a couple nights.  I don’t want to take CARE of other people, but I’m happy to let them be in my space.

Luciana came over at 11:00 p.m. on Tuesday night rather than drive all the way to the other side of Athens that late.  We stayed up a couple hours talking about feminism and literature: two of my favorite sleepover topics!

Natasha came at 11:00 p.m. on Friday night (she flew in late) and stayed for two nights.  She is scared of Hans Harrison, so I gave her my room and slept on the couch.  That is where Hans Harrison often sleeps, so I woke up in the middle of the night to him settling down heavily across my neck.  It was uncomfortable but so cute, so I let him stay.

But before that, I went out to dinner with Kendra to celebrate her recent engagement.  We talked for hours and hours, and I’m so glad to have an American friend in Greece.  We talked about how there are these concentric circles of walls between ourselves and other people, and it’s such a slow, exhausting process to take them down.  One of the walls is between ourselves and people from other countries, so being with Kendra means one less wall to take down.  It’s nice.

On Saturday, I met Maria and her husband John for lunch.  Just two Greeks and an American eating Persian food while discussing their recent trips to Sweden and Slovenia!  I like having couple-friends, and I like that Maria can be both my Greek teacher (when I’m not taking free lessons) AND a friend.

On Saturday night, the Holargos girls (me, Tatiana, Natasha) wandered the neighborhood to find somewhere to eat.  We wound up at a creperie, where we each got savery crepes before splitting a crepe with CHOCOLATE, BOUGATSA CREAM, and CRUMBLED COOKIES.  Omg.

And then on Sunday, I actually went to church!  Woo hoo!  I still sat by myself, but afterwards there were many more people there that I knew, returned from summer holidays.  Bible study is starting up this next Wednesday, so hopefully I can deepen some relationships and feel more at home at church.  We will see!

Sunday Summary #40

There is only one thing worth seeing this week on the Internet, and it is Sia’s music video tribute to the 49 children (this video makes it so obvious that they were just CHILDREN, having fun and being dumb and maybe reckless, but children nonetheless) who were murdered in the Orlando club.

Maybe you’ll be able to get through this without crying, but I sure couldn’t.

The Benefits of Fundraising

It’s easy to complain about fundraising; after all, it is very awkward and stressful.  But the past couple days have been really encouraging for me, and I remembered something important.

I chose this.

I have a lot of contacts with a mission organization that pays its missionaries.  I could have tried to work with them (and I actually did serve through them when I spent five months in Senegal), but I decided that I would rather raise my own funds.  Why would I possibly choose to make my life more difficult?

  1. Fundraising keeps me humble.
    There is nothing quite like saying, “The only way I can do this thing I want to do is if you’ll help me,” to create humility.  I go through much of life believing that I am in control and that I only need to rely upon myself.  It is good for my ego to have to rely upon other people.
  2. Fundraising inspires me to be grateful.
    If humility means giving control of your life to someone else, then WOW does it feel great when they take care of you.  Although I can definitely be a self-centered asshole at times, it really helps when I stop and think, “This person worked hard to make money.  They could spend that money on clothes, vacations, or a new phone.  They could buy BOOKS with that money, but instead they are giving some of it to me.”  And that never fails to fill me with a wave of incredible gratitude.
  3. Fundraising gives me opportunities to draw close to people.
    In addition to the closeness that comes from asking for help, there is a second closeness that fundraising provides.  I recently started praying through the list of people who donated to me last year.  Not praying that they would give again, but just, attempting to dig into those humble and grateful postures where I bring people before God and ask him to bless them.  This does wonders for my heart, and I find myself madly in love with dozens of people after these times of prayer.
  4. Fundraising gifts me with opportunities of people drawing close to me.
    This is actually my favorite part of fundraising.  I am a needy person, and I so love when people send me messages.  I guess opening myself up and admitting that I need help financially reminds people that I also need help emotionally and spiritually.  One of the best parts of this is when someone I haven’t talked to in a long time reaches out, and my heart just absolutely overflows.

Humans are needy creatures.  We cannot survive on our own without the physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual support of others.  Fundraising helps me admit that I have needs, and (revelation I had while in counseling) when I open up about my needs…they get met!  So whether you’re in a position to need fundraising or not, I encourage each of you to get vulnerable with someone trustworthy and tell them one of your needs.

With that in mind, if you’d like to make a donation to help me stay in Athens, Greece and continue working in a safe house for women who have been sexually exploited and trafficked, click below!

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Enneagram 4: Walking Through the Hard Emotions

I’m an Enneagram 4, which means when I feel an emotion, I think, “Let’s feel more of this,” even when it’s a bad emotion.  That said…

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My word, this week has been heavy, and it’s only Tuesday. I had a rough weekend-I felt lonely and alone (two similar but different emotions), overwhelmed by the idea of continuing to live in a foreign country, hopeless that I could ever create a community here like the ones I had in Peoria, Jackson, Fatick, and Dallas. I threw myself a pity party by staying isolated the whole weekend and eating more chocolate than is perhaps healthy.

Then I went to work and it all got heavier. Staff members shared some extremely difficult life circumstances that they are dealing with. I led our morning temperature check with the participants, and it took three times longer than usual because they too were dealing with huge things.

One of the things I love about the enneagram is that it states that the best things about our personality are also the worst things. Continue reading

God Finds Me Even When I Don’t Go To Church

I am writing this on a Sunday morning when I ought to be in church, but instead am sitting at a coffee shop table in the center of a park near my house.  I am only here after an hour of mental anguish, because I knew I OUGHT to go to church, but I didn’t want to.  Well, part of me wanted to.  It’s the first Sunday of the month, which is when the church I (half-heartedly) attend does Communion, and Communion is the one thing about church that I find consistently satisfying.

But mostly I didn’t want to.  I loathe the process of going to church on my own.  Getting ready alone, walking to the metro alone, riding the metro alone, walking several blocks alone, opening the door alone, scanning the seats for a familiar face alone, seeing them sitting in a full seat and therefore finding my own place.  Alone.  It is hell.

So I didn’t go.  But it’s a beautiful day, and I DID want Communion with God, that mysterious practice that reminds me that I cannot do life on my own but must, in some way, consistently take Jesus inside of me as the food I eat and the wine I drink.  So I came to this park, and I’m drinking coffee (it felt weird to order wine at 11:00 a.m.), eating a croissant, and reading Gospel by J.D. Greear.

For the past few years, I have been trying to trust that God’s love for me is not dependent upon my actions.   Continue reading

A Week in Greece #34: ELIZABETH LEAVES :(

I have so loved having Elizabeth here!  She is one of my very best friends, and on top of that, we have extremely similar living/traveling habits.  For instance, our decision to take a 9-hour ferry from Crete to Athens instead of a 50-minute flight turned out to be pretty disastrous.  We left port at 9:00 p.m., and the entire boat turned into a chaotic mass of people scrambling to find a chair, bench, or piece of floor to call their own.  The majority of the trip consisted of trying to find a comfortable position to sleep in while the lights were fully on, then being woken up at 5:30 a.m. to stand for an hour before they let us off.  BUT, after admitting to each other that this was not a great decision, we both agreed that it was an adventure worth having and we were glad we’d experienced it.  It’s nice to have a friend like that.

It was also nice that Elizabeth did all the Athens touristy things on her own!  I went back to work this week, and while I was at meetings or doing lesson planning, Elizabeth went to the Acropolis and various museums.  It felt great to not have to take care of her, and I was grateful for the opportunity to avoid paying to see the Parthenon for a fourth time.

Instead, we spent evenings watching movies.  We had both prepared feminist masterpieces to share with the other: I wanted her to see Magic Mike XXL and she wanted me to see Ex Machina).  One night we went to IKEA, Continue reading

Sunday Summary #39

THIS IS EVERYTHING.  Thor hanging out with Darryl in Australia, unhappily “not caring” about Tony Stark and Steve Rogers fighting without him, making nonsense mystery boards about the Infinity Stones…PERFECT.

“Dude? Don’t you get it??  Here at Lambda Alpha Lambda, we keep toxic masculinity in check!”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M0qr5cS5FhY

Let’s make this man our next vice president!

DUBSMASH at the Palace of Knossos in Crete

I have a new obsession:  Dubsmash!  This app has provided me with HOURS of gleeful giggling at my face, which is honestly one of my favorite pastimes.  I think I’ll try to put together some compilations like this one so that everyone else can have a good laugh (and perhaps join the app yourself!  and friend me so we can send dumb videos to each other!).

The Palace of Knossos is remarkable and beautiful and everyone should visit it while in Crete…but you won’t see much of that in this video.  Instead, there are time travel references, screaming Indiana Jones, and a valley girl who almost definitely existed thousands of years ago too.

What I Read | August 2016

From a Russian classic to a dragon-centric fantasy to inspirational non-fiction…my reading tastes were diverse this month!


theidiotThe Idiot by Fyodor Dostoevsky

I started this in July at the request of one of my new friends.  It’s her favorite novel of all time, and while I can’t claim that for myself, I was really impressed with it.  I’ve always felt scared of the dense Russian novels, but I found The Idiot to be a quick read for 700+ pages of stories and psychological analyses.  It did take me a while to acclimate myself to upper class Russian society in the 1800s, but there was enough common humanity to keep to me going.  It’s also pretty depressing, so fair warning.

Harry_Potter_and_the_Cursed_Child_Special_Rehearsal_Edition_Book_CoverHarry Potter and the Cursed Child by J. K. Rowling

I loved this!  It in no way compares to the novels, but I never wanted it to.  The screenplay is a quick way to jump back into the world of Harry Potter, and I so enjoyed watching Harry struggle once more (he can save the world, but he doesn’t know how to parent a child – seems accurate).  I also loved Draco getting more development and the adorable relationship between Albus and Scorpius.  Perhaps it really is HP fanfiction, but I love HP fanfiction, so that is not an insult in the slightest to my mind.

220px-HmsdragonHis Majesty’s Dragon by Naomi Novik

After reading this alt-history novel about dragons during the Napoleonic War, I am 100% that dragons are cats with wings.  Obviously, this means I am SUPER into a story about the intense bond between human and dragon, though I felt this first novel was more interesting for the potential it showed for future stories than its own entertainment value.

ThroneofjadeThrone of Jade by Naomi Novik

Speaking of future stories…this is the second Temeraire novel, and as I suspected, it was even better than the first!  This book follows Laurence and Temeraire on a long sea voyage to China, and it’s basically just one long “you two shouldn’t be together” “YES WE SHOULD” argument, which is exactly the sort of quasi-romantic co-dependent relationship I’m easily invested in.  Can’t wait to read more!

6415185Lost to the West: The Forgotten Byzantine Empire by Lars Brownsworth

Wow.  This non-fiction book about the history of the Byzantine Empire was SO engrossing, mostly because it is person centered rather than date centered.  I totally fell in love with General Belisarius and want to read even more about his life.  I also fell in love with the Byzantine Empire itself, to the point that I actually started crying when it finally fell and the Roman empire came to an official end (1,000 after its western counterpart).

710391The Story of My Life by Casanova

I was so excited about Casanova’s memoir.  It was super entertaining, and I really enjoyed reading about a sex-positive guy who seemed to be shameless in a really healthy way…until I got to a part where he participated in a gang rape and assured his readers that the woman really liked it.  At that point I felt physically ill for days, because I genuinely felt so betrayed.  I couldn’t read any more, and I don’t really care to find out what he did after that, because I doubt it was “felt remorse.”

34352-1Salt of the Sea by Ruta Sepetys

I didn’t enjoy this quite as much as Sepetys’s other YA novels, but it was still a quick and interesting read.  She follows four people (with their own perspective and voice) to the harrowing voyage of the ship Wilhelm Gustloff…a true event that deserves for more attention than it usually gets.  I was mostly impressed, however, by how she showed that for many people in Germany/Prussia/Poland/etc, neither the Axis or Allied powers were good guys.  Death, rape, and property possession was inevitable, no matter which side won.

prototypPrototype by Jonathan Martin

I’ve already written a couple blog posts based on how inspired I was by this non-fiction Christian book.  It’s a fantastic reminder that transformation only comes when we are totally confident in God’s deep love for us.  I especially loved the way he described living in God’s love – that it’s found in those moments when we feel most free and creative, not when we’re hunkered in a room reading our Bibles (well, maybe it is for you, but not me).  It’s a very encouraging and uplifting book that I highly recommend to anyone who wants to deepen their understanding of God.


Did you read anything this month that was especially amazing (or especially awful)?  Leave a comment below and let me know!

Sunday Summary #38

1|  Travel as Therapy – an Introduction by The Book of Life

I love the idea of considering travel destinations in terms of psychological virtues rather than surface level pursuits of a “culture weekend” or “island hideaway.”  And I love their examples of places to go, as well as the accompanying virtue, at the end of the piece!

“In the future, we would ideally be more conscious travellers – aware that we were on a search for places that could deliver psychological virtues like ‘calm’ or ‘perspective,’ ‘sensuality’ or ‘rigour’. A visitor to Monument Valley wouldn’t just be in it for a bit of undefined ‘adventure’, something to enjoy and then gradually forget about two weeks later; travelling to the place would be an occasion fundamentally to reorient one’s personality.”

2|  Yesssss!  The Star Trek cast is killing Dubsmash!