1| Carrie Fisher was an amazing woman, and these 19 tweets complied by Buzzfeed honor her perfectly.
2| Being “home” this month made me especially thrilled to read the Travelettes piece on the pros and cons of feeling at home, nodding furiously at everything they said.
3| The best surprise!
I returned to my hometown this month, which means I got a LOT of books at my public library. This is especially noteworthy because somehow in smalltown Illinois, my library is really great at stocking diverse books. The number of books I read about people of color BY people of color increased this month, which I’m quite pleased about. I also accidentally read several books with the word “star” in the title, but they had nothing in common beyond that.
Case Histories by Kate AtkinsonI’m not usually into the mystery genre, but this book was excellent! Each character (and there are a lot of them) is detailed and flawed and believable. There is a lot of violence against women, but that’s the point: there is a lot of violence against women. I love a good male protagonist (bonus points for a detective) who understands this reality and grieves it.
Hitman Anders and the Meaning of It All by Jonas JonassonJonasson is a hilarious writer with amazing dry wit. This book covers some dark topics (murders, cons, fake religions) and somehow turns our awful protagonists into accidentally good people that we the readers root for. Yet another reason to go to Sweden!
Why Be Happy When You Could Be Normal by Jeanette WintersonOooowww, this book is emotionally painful. It is the sad and beautiful memoir of a woman raised by an abusive mother who somehow manages to fiercely pursue life and love. It’s very quotable, and towards the end I was especially intrigued by Winterson’s fascinating ideas about madness – what causes it and how to find healing.
The Demon in the Wood by Leigh BardugoThis is a short story about the Darkling from the Grisha Trilogy, and I am always interested in the backstory’s of villains. This story humanizes him and explains his behaviors, but more interestingly, it shows how individual actions are created by, and reinforce, cultural oppression.
Sofia Khan is Not Obliged by Ayisha MalikI did not know how much I needed a Muslim Pride and Prejudice in my life, but I did! This is such a fun and cute book that feels familiar while also being a refreshingly unique interpretation on an overdone classic. I loved reading about modern Muslim culture in the Western world, and Sofia’s Bridget Jones-esque diary entries are perfection. I can’t recommend this enough.
Serafina’s Promise by Ann E. BurgThis novel in verse about a young Haitian girl who dreams of someday attending school so that she can become a doctor is a beautiful story beautifully written. Serafina fights for her dreams despite poverty and the Haitian earthquake, giving us lines like: “Without dreams the world is only dirt and dust.”
The Midnight Star by Marie LuI loved Lu’s Young Elite series, but I found this final book a lot weirder than the others in a way that doesn’t quite fit. I had to keep reminding myself that we had already established their magical world, but somehow the mystical realm of death stuff felt out of place. I also wish that Adelina’s villainy had stuck more – the book never could quite commit to her descent into a lust for power and control.
Fish in a Tree by Lynda Mullaly HuntA cute middle grade book about a dyslexic girl whose new teacher manages to understand her and show her her greatness. It is simplistic but lovely, and a great book for kids to learn the value of differences. Definitely something I would have pushed hard when I was a children’s librarian.
A Court of Mist and Fury by Sarah J. MaasThis is an excellent sequel to a mediocre book. I cannot describe how thrilled I was when the stereotypical romance from A Court of Thorns and Roses was revealed to be not protective…but abusive. Feyre’s growing affections for Rhysand make total sense because he is a feminist fantasy: an extremely powerful, intelligent, witty man who only wants to let his loved one make her own choices and be her best self. The plot is non-stop, the romance is sizzling, and I am mad that I have to wait several more months for the next book!
The Sun is Also a Star by Nicola YoonThis unrealistic but engrossing romance details the one day in which a Korean guy and a Jamaican girl meet and fall in love before she is deported away from New York City. I rolled my eyes at the love-at-first-site gimic quite a bit, but the book won major points for its unique POV-changing chapters. We see things from both protagonists’ points of view, but also from parents and the guy who almost ran into them. Because of that, the story is both tiny (one day) but also broad (so many people affected their meeting).
The Last Star by Rick YanceyThe final book in the 5th Wave series is a worse disappointment than the LOST series finale. So many questions were left unanswered, and some of the answers were so convoluted and ridiculous that I didn’t even try to understand. I found this to be a very unsatisfying conclusion to what started as a thrilling series.
A Time to Dance by Padma VenkatramanAnother novel in verse, this time about an Indian girl who loses and regains her dream of dancing after her foot is amputated. It’s an inspiring story that feels both diverse and universal. I really liked the story’s assertion that rather than ruining a person’s creativity, pain and loss can actually deepen and enrich a person’s artwork.
The Last Summer of the Death Warriors by Francisco X. StorkThis is SUCH a great book. It feels light even though it covers heavy topics – Pancho is an orphaned teenager who wants to find and kill the man who murdered his mentally disabled sister, but who then finds new meaning in life when he is befriended by a guy with brain cancer. Yikes, right? But despite the morbid plot points, this book is so uplifting and inspiring. That’s the point though: in a world of death and pain, we can still choose to pursue life and love every day that we are given.
I’m heading back to Athens, Greece in 2017! I will continue to volunteer at HD, though in time I’ve been away, we already have another participant and our first baby. Things should continue to be interesting and challenging at work, which is exactly how I like it. On the social end of things, it will be so nice to return to my own apartment and my own cat, to grow already existing friendships instead of creating new ones from scratch.
One of the strange things about moving to a new city is how long the process of finding friends really is. It’s easy to meet new people, but sometimes you don’t realize that you don’t click until a month or two in, and sometimes you immediately click but your schedules never match up. It takes time to find the people who will be a consistent, fun, and supportive presence in your life. Luckily, I did most of that work last year, so I get to reap the rewards and jump right back into hanging out with Luciana, Giorgos, Kendra, and Rosie.
Most of my goals for next year are the same as last: keep learning Greek, keep traveling, keep figuring out what to do next year. The fact that I am kind of reliving my year makes me want to die, though, so here are some new goals. Never be stagnant!
This year I want to travel solo. There are often deals on Ryanair that offer flights for only €10 each way, but I pass them by because I can’t find anyone willing to spontaneously go on a weekend trip. Why waste the opportunity? And honestly, the more I think about it, the more fun it sounds to wander Budapest on my own.
Hm. That’s honestly the only new thing I can think of. Maybe I would want to join a dance class or something? One of those ridiculous hipster dance classes that focuses on body positivity that Luciana told me about. Or self-defense! I don’t know, and probably I wouldn’t spend money on something like that, but I’ll keep my eyes open.
Other than those things, I really am just going to focus on: keep learning Greek. Keep trying to figure out what the next step is. Keep enjoying where I am while I’m there.
Bring it, 2017!
These are the ten most popular posts on ItIsTrish in 2016 (though they were not necessarily written this year):
Based on those statistics, you’d think I was only an INFJ site. But no, this is a far less cohesive place than that! In the interest of diversity, here are ten of my favorite posts from 2016:
(I read them in 2016; they were not necessarily published in 2016)
All the Bright Places by Jennifer Niven
The nature and causes of mental illnesses is explored in this unique, beautiful love story between two teenagers. Do not read in public if you have an ugly crying face!
The Good Girl’s Guide to Getting Lost by Rachel Friedman
A perfectionistic young woman stops trying to please everyone else and travels throughout Ireland, Australia, and South America. It was relevant to my life.
Lost to the West: The Forgotten Byzantine Empire by Lars Brownsworth
Yes, this is a non-fiction book about the Byzantine Empire. But if you are even slightly interested in history, this is SUCH an engrossing story.
The Penelopiad by Margaret Atwood
A retelling of The Odyssey from Penelope’s perspective that is unreliable, clever, and socially scathing.
Sofia Khan is Not Obliged by Ayisha Malik (review not up yet)
A Pride and Prejudice retelling starring a Muslim girl in England – it’s actually different enough from the source material to be worth reading!
Uprooted by Naomi Novik
A stand-alone fantasy novel that has intensely original worldbuilding and a slow burn of a romance that doesn’t supercede our heroine’s character development.
What were some of your favorite books that you read this year?
As usual, I judge the success of my years by how much traveling I manage to get in. Here’s a quick rundown!
Traveling is my happy place, and it was especially good fortune that during one of the most stressful years of my life, I was surrounded by an enormous amount of cheap, beautiful, diverse weekend destinations. Here’s hoping that traveling doesn’t feel quite so necessary next year, but that I’ll still get to hit up several amazing places!
One of my bucket list goals was to live in Europe for at least six months, and 2016 was the year I made that a reality. Because of the connection I made with Dina twelve years ago, she invited me to join her in launching HD, a non-profit safe house and recovery program for women who have been sexually assaulted and trafficked in Athens, Greece. It was one of the most amazing years of my life, both because I got to use my talents to do meaningful work and because I stretched myself enormously in adapting to a foreign culture. Honestly, right now I still feel pretty burnt out by it all, but I wouldn’t trade my experience for the world. Which is good, since I’m going to keep living in Athens and working with HD throughout 2017 (but we’ll get there in a future blog post)!
I could go through a blow-by-blow of what happened in 2016, but instead, I’m going to base this post upon the five resolutions I made a year ago.
1| Say yes to more things that scare me.
I think I did all right on this one, although I did not anticipate how “things that scare me” would grow to include “walking down the street to buy pet food.” Things got rough for a while. (Let me clarify, that wasn’t scary because of facts, but because of my brain.) Overall, this whole year was scary! Although I love traveling, the process of making a foreign country your home takes SO much effort, and it required almost constant “yes”s to work opportunities, friendships, and responsibilities.
2| Focus on health.
Balancing #1, I think I did a GREAT job in letting myself say “no” to things. I knew before I moved to Greece that my personal inclination is to do everything and be perfect to everyone around me. But I said no to a ministry opportunity, and when leaving my apartment felt impossible, I let myself cancel plans and then form new ones when I was feeling less empty.
I also got physically healthy. Thanks to lots of walking and a country that makes eating healthy an easy priority, I lost weight and gained endurance. Until a bunch of friends visited in October and November, and then I came home to the States for the holidays, anyway. But health isn’t a one-time goal – there’s always next year to keep going!
3| Learn enough Greek to go shopping, navigate public transportation, and carry on basic conversations.
Wow! I’m so glad I set the bar low on this one. I can definitely shop, navigate public transportation, and carry on basic conversations in Greek. I can even carry on medium conversations in Greek, although my brain gets tired very quickly, and usually only with people who make me feel safe.
4| Visit at least five countries during the year.
I did this too, though there will be an entire blog post on travel tomorrow!
5| Decide what I’ll be doing in 2017, and where.
Yup, did that too! I’m going to be staying in Athens and continuing to work with HD. Now if only I knew what I’ll be doing in 2018…but I never seem to know much beyond a year from now.
I was going to start this post with something like, “I’ve been home for three weeks, but I am still incapable of anything creative,” and then I paused to double check my timeline. It has not been three weeks. It has only been a week and a half. I think this says a lot about my tendency to expect too much of myself.
I’m still so mentally exhausted. And socially exhausted. Which is a real curse, because there are so many people in Illinois (including my awesome friend Michal Ann, who flew here for a few days to see me while I’m stateside), and I genuinely do want to see them. But I feel so empty, and it takes so much energy just to cash checks at a drive-through bank, let alone spend extended periods of time with people, let alone write creative blog posts.
But I’m (slowly) working on a year-end review, much like the end of 2015. So although there won’t be new content this week, expect daily posts beginning next Monday! And here are some pictures of Michal and I being idiots, to tide everyone over.
1| There is nothing I love more than grown men giggling helplessly. This video goes in my “Keep in Case of Sadness” mental category.
Seeing old friends in the United States after living for a year in Greece, the question I heard more than any other was,
Which is a weird question, because why not the much easier and more common, “How are you?”
Here’s why, says my internet-ranting brain: because people assume that home is better than away, and that they know what I like and need more than I do!!
I’m being too harsh, I know, and I ought to be grateful that people paid attention to my life at all, I know (though not anymore, haha!). But it touched a nerve.
That was easier than saying the true answer, which is something like, “Not really. I mean, it’s nice to sleep all the time and for my mom to make me hot chocolate, but I miss Athens. I miss having my own home, and while I love being with Rory Cat, I miss Hans Harrison and worry that he’s adjusting to his new home. I miss the friends that I was just starting to feel close to and all the people that were bringing out new passions in me and creating safe places for me. I miss waking up with a purpose and going to work and knowing that I am a valuable part of a really wonderful organization. I want to be there for Christmas parties, and I want to eat souvlaki, and I want to misunderstand someone’s Greek, and I want to walk to the metro station while listening to a podcast, and sure it’s nice to have the freedom of driving again, but I’ve CHANGED, and I feel like you are trying to make me into who I used to be with this stupid question about how much better it is to be home than to be in this amazing ugly cool place that I made my own!!!!”
Alternative Comments For When Someone Returns From Living Abroad
It Is Trish 